I had wanted to have a nice intro to this blog and to myself. But, I figure this sums what you're about to get into pretty nicely:
[Mom] "Wow, road rage much?"
[Me] "That wasn't road rage."
[Mom] "You honked twice, pointed, then rapid-fire honked 5 times while pointing at the light going 'Green! Green! Greeeeen!'. What else would you call that?"
[Me] "It's only road rage when it's unnecessary… This was absolutely necessary. He was keeping me from my food because he was fucking with his GPS. WHILE THE LIGHT WAS GREEN. So technically he was committing a moving violation by not going when he was supposed to. Thus, I not only made my point and got his attention, I saved him from getting a ticket since we're RIGHT ACROSS THE STREET FROM THE POLICE STATION. *points* I'm a good person."
I'd love to say 'and then I had cake', but it was only soup. Chicken noodle soup. I needed comfort food, saving people from traffic violations is hard work.